literature

daze

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amy-derfer's avatar
By
Published:
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Literature Text

some people are frightened by
things bright enough
to blind them

and you,
with the radioactive
smile

when you greet someone
at five in the afternoon

let the stunned
“good morning” of a reply
remind you

how it feels to be
mistaken for the
dawn
yea
© 2013 - 2024 amy-derfer
Comments3
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Nullibicity's avatar

The simplicity of this is enough to steal your breath away! I loved watching the story unfold, and your word choice really just drove the intensity of this poem further. Over all, a really light and passionate piece filled with life and love. Everything was just very organized, and it all flowed together with excellent consistency. I often tell people that this consistency is hard to find or master, but when it's used, it just dazzles people! You've utilized that quite superbly here, and I love being swept up within your words.

 

I especially found this poem enjoyable, I think, because of the light tone I mentioned earlier. That last stanza was stunning, the whole poem really reminding me of that golden hour when sunlight, yellow and rich as honey, streams through the window like heaven has opened up and revealed itself in your living room. It was such a rich image, for me, and I adored the fact that your poem bestowed it upon me. So we have some marvelous rhythms, fantastic flow, and a memorable concept made completely original and modern. What other reasons do I need to love this to bits? A definite A+ in my opinion! Great job :heart:

 

I really am loving what I’m reading so far of your words! You’ve such a unique insight, and I relish the new perspective! Your style is also quite compelling! I look forward to reading more! <3